10 Things to Ask Yourself Before You Start Searching
- Is this the right time in my life to start searching?
If you are in the middle of planning a big event in your life: wedding, new or another baby due, this is probably not the right time to start searching. I started searching during the time I was planning my wedding in another country and it was not the right thing to do. I was a complete mess one minute when I couldn't find any answers and happy the next returning calls for my wedding. I was a wreck. I never knew if I should be happy or sad during this time in my life. Both events were going to change my life forever and they definitely did not go hand in hand. - Am I ready?
Mentally, physically, emotionally? - Do I have a support system?
Do the people in your life support your search? Have a family meeting; make sure you include your adopted parents and your siblings. This will affect them too. - What am I searching for?
Do you want a relationship with whom you are searching for? Do you just want medical information? Or do you just want to know if they are still alive? These are some things to take into consideration before you search. - Am I prepared (emotional, physically, mentally)?
Make sure you prepare yourself for what you may or may not find. Talk to your spouse or a close friend for guidance. - Have I read up on any search and reunion books? Please see the link for "Recommended Reading" on this website.
- Have I consider the repercussion for myself, the people in my life or the people I am searching for?
This search and possible reunion is going to not only affect you it will affect everyone in your circle of life. Not only your circle of friends and family but consider the people in the lives of the one you are searching for. - Am I prepared for rejection?
We all have fantasy's of who we came from and what type of people they are going to be but reality is they may not want to be found and you need to mentally prepare your self for possible rejection. - What if the person you are searching for wants more from the reunion than you do?
It is important to establish the type of relationship you want from who you are searching for before you begin the search process. - Am I prepared for unexpected information?
You need to take into consideration that who you are searching for could be very sick or worse deceased and you may never find what you are searching for. Make sure to prepare yourself for that.
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